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  1. Billion times Infinity

    May 19, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    I must have taken a decidedly different approach to what has been, for the last few days, bodily horror upon horror– last night before I got knocked out, I must have told myself “self, despite being ill, we must find the humor in this.”  The last thing I remember is fighting to stay away upon realizing that an 8 am bedtime on a Friday night was depressing in itself and reaching for my cough drops.  I woke up this morning, with 3 Honey-Lemon Cough Drops in one hand and my feet tangled in a fluff of Tissue, lol.  If you don’t think that’s funny, my pillow hairstylist that fashioned my hair into half faux-hawk, half Phil Spector would do the trick, I bet.  It made me smile.  Maybe experiencing a smile, first thing in the morning instead of the obligatory groan is what helped me feel better because today, I feel like I can actually wobble out into the real world (or at least get the mail).

    Mama made me a spicy Beef & Kimchi Soup for Dinner (and again–the horror of not being able to taste my food)!

    Baby Brother sang me a lullaby.  Sort of ;)

    So big plans for the rest of the day!  a). re-read one of the books from my library b). allow more sleep to work out the kinks in my body or c). re-watch The Walking Dead.  How will I ever decide?

    Today, I’m feeling a billion x infinity better (remember doing that as a Kid, lol)?  I may just very well have a video up tomorrow =D

    Hope everyone’s day has been filled with Sunshine and yumminess.

    XOXO

    Your (billion x infinity) better

    Squishy Monster

    Categories: Life | 8 Comments

  2. 3 Things Thursday

    May 17, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    It’s 3:15 and I didn’t go to work today. My throat is angry with me, I think. Red and botched, it’s radiating so much heat, I think you could bloat a Marshmallow. It’s sort of strange. Typing, constructing sentences when I haven’t even talked to anyone today. I wonder if I’ll even make any sense, considering that I’m running a bit of a fever and doped up on so many otc’s.  Maybe I’ll come back to re-read this entry and laugh, but today, I’ve been floating amidst a cloud of pillows on an island within 4 walls–yet a happy prisoner, having been given the opportunity to spend quality time with Caroline who lives in my new book, My Abandonment.    I love stories about survival.  I think that’s where my quasi-obsession with Zombies comes from.  It’s been a quick and easy read, and one that I’ve finished in two days.  Either Caroline is positively fascinating or listlessly staring at where my pink wall ends and the white of the ceiling begins because you’re too tired to move isn’t fascinating enough (could be a combination of both). I can’t begin to tell you how productive I feel by just typing, lol.  So, it’s been an entire day spent snuggling with my book, my hilarious box of tissues that reads “I’m there when you’re sick, feel better, tissue” or “I’m there when you’re sad, love, tissue”, Chap Stick, and Lemon Cough Drops.  None of these things can talk, and I’m glad because I’d be in no mood to respond but similarly, they don’t snuggle back.

    This is the last thing I ate before I lost my sense of taste (my very least favorite part of being sick.  Biscuit, Taters, Turkey Bacon, and Fried Green Tomatoes).  I can still remember how it tasted but I’m sure my mouth wouldn’t even appreciate it at this moment.  Not to be morbid or anything (but, I am), a few months before, authorities had discovered that one of their Cooks had slaughtered and dumped the body of another employee in a neighboring dumpster, here.  Crazy how crazy people can be everywhere.  Death was a theme in my book for the sake of survival.  In suburbia, what is it that snaps, I’d like to know…

    Jujube Tea.  Sweet & Good.  It’s what’s for Breakfast and Lunch.  My energy is waning and I want a Cheeseburger, instead :(

    I’m hot, then I’m cold (but this is sooo not a bouncy Katy Perry video).  Nodding in and out of sleep, I’ve been having dreams of baked yummies.  Hopefully this manifests itself into a video, soon.

    Fantasizing about a claw foot tub filled with screaming hot, lavender water and bubbles I could get lost in.

    I love you.

    and you!

    XOXO

    Your sniffle-cough-sneeze-groan

    Squishy Monster ^.^

    Categories: Life | 9 Comments

  3. Rigatoni & Braised Ribs

    May 15, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    One of my absolute favorite things to do is to peruse the aisles of my Market.  A bystander might scoff at the excruciatingly slow process of me picking up beautiful jars of this and that, just to stare, turn over in my grasp, and ponder.  The adventure of the Grocery Store begins from the get go.  Where else can you melt nuggets of softened cheese bites in your mouth proudly displayed next to ripened, local fruit, also begging to be tasted?  If Nordstrom’s started doling out Chocolate samples while you shopped, I would reconsider going shoe shopping but if not, forgettaboutit!

    My most recent trip had my eco-bags burdened with the weight of bulky Short Ribs.  I’m particularly fond of fatty striped Meats.  I’m not too fond of the incommensurate price of them.  Wearing more Bone and Fat, Short Ribs seem to have a pretty high ticket (to me) so I don’t often buy them, but alas!  These were on sale, and I’m always a sucker for sales!  In Squishy-verse, food sale = larger quantity for my belly.  I can’t even begin to express the pure joy I felt from hauling in my 4 lbs of free-range Short Ribs and smugly setting them on my counter, knowing just what to do with them…

     

     

    Print
    Rigatoni & Braised Ribs

    Rigatoni & Braised Ribs

    Ingredients

    • 4 lbs Beef Short Ribs + Flour to dredge
    • 1 Onion
    • 4 Garlic Cloves
    • 1 ts dried Thyme
    • 2 Bay Leaves
    • 1/4 c Kalamata Olives
    • 1 c Roasted Red Peppers
    • 1 c Beef Broth
    • 1 c Red Wine
    • 2 tb Red Pepper Flakes
    • 1/2 c - 1 c reserved Pasta Water
    • 1/4 c Heavy Cream
    • 1 lb Rigatoni (or Pasta shape of your choice)
    • 1/2 c Parmigiano Reggiano
    • 1/4 c fresh Parsley

    Instructions

    1. Set out your Ribs 30 minutes prior to cooking. Rinse and dredge in a mixture of Flour, Salt, and Pepper. Shake off excess and sear all sides in a hot pan, glossed over with Canola/Veggie Oil.
    2. Remove your Ribs, set aside and in the same (completely heat proof pan-will be transferring the entire pot to the oven later), drizzle over some Olive Oil and soften your Onion, Garlic, Thyme, and Bay Leaves. Salt and Pepper. Make sure to scrape up all the delicious brown bits with your wooden spoon.
    3. Tumble in your Olives, Peppers, Broth, Wine, Pepper Flakes. Allow it to come to a fierce bubble. Salt and Pepper.
    4. Snugly fit in your Ribs into the pot and transfer to your oven, loosely covered with foil and bake at 350 for 2 1/2-3 hours.
    5. After this time, extract your Ribs and set aside. About 20 minutes later, begin shredding with your hands or 2 forks.
    6. Take your Sauce (sans Meat) and blend it to a thick, chunky consistency with your blender/food processor. At the last moment, twirl in your Cream.
    7. Cook your Pasta and transfer to your Sauce with a slotted spoon (reserve 1 c water), and top with Cheese, directly on top of your hot Pasta. Combine.
    8. Toss in your shredded Beef with your cheesy Pasta.
    9. Pour in your Sauce, drizzle in your reserved Pasta water as needed, Salt and Pepper and sprinkle with Parsley or more Cheese.

    Notes

    This is also stellar over Polenta, Mashed Potatoes, Rice, or Buttered Egg Noodles. If you're worried about fat, allow just your Sauce to cool a great bit and skim off the top that floats up.

    http://www.thesquishymonster.com/2012/05/rigatoni-braised-ribs.html

    Proud to bring you some Meaty, Cheesy Goodness on a boring ole’ Tuesday!

    Love,

    Your Squishy Monster ^.^

    Categories: Comfort Foods, Comfort Foods, Meats, Meats, Pasta | 21 Comments

  4. Rainy Day + Pink Cake

    Vanilla Bean Cake

    May 14, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    The Fam had full intentions of dining al fresco (my favorite way to eat) but Mother Nature (not to be forgotten on Mother’s Day), decided to blow in with a bold statement and pelted down fat droplets to rain on that parade.  We still managed to wrangle in our small Family and enjoy an intimate Supper.  Just us 4 minus my other Baby Bro (who is far away in the Netherlands).

    Lobster Ravioli + Grilled Asparagus (I think I may do a Video on this)

    3-layer Vanilla Bean Cake smeared with Cream Cheese Frosting + Handmade Cake Bunting …but with the flurry of all that biz-nass, my bottom tier kind of heaved a sigh and dropped down to take a Frosting nap :/

    We also had Warm Goat Cheese Bruschetta and Blood Orange Italian Cream Sodas, too.

    Here’s my Cake Recipe (bakes up a super soft, cloudy Cake):

    Print
    Vanilla Bean Cake

    Ingredients

      Dry:
    • 2 c Flour
    • 3 ts Baking Powder
    • 1 ts Salt
      • Wet:
    • 12 tb soft, unsalted Butter
    • 1 1/2 c Vanilla Sugar* (or regular granulated)
    • 1 scraped Vanilla Bean (or 2 ts Vanilla Extract)
    • 6 Egg Whites
    • 1 c whole Milk

    Instructions

    1. Sift together all of your dry ingredients in your first bowl.
    2. In your second bowl, begin by creaming together your Butter and Sugar. You want it to become fluffy and take on a pale, blonde color.
    3. Add your Vanilla Bean or Extract (split the pod and using a sharp paring knife, scrape each half. What you end up with is beautifully scented, dark brown "gunk." That is what you want).
    4. Add your Whites in a steady stream a bit at a time. You want to fully incorporate them. You can stop when your Whites become frothy/bubbly.
    5. Tip in your Milk (I use Coconut Milk sometimes and think it's lovely).
    6. Now, it's time to combine your first, dry bowl to your second, wet bowl. Combine together slowly (in three additions or so) and only mix to combine. Stop when it just comes together (you don't want to over beat).
    7. Grease/Flour your 8" pans and fill 3 or 4 pans with even amounts of Batter.
    8. Bake at 350 for 19-22 minutes.
    9. Cool completely and slather with your favorite Buttercream or Cream Cheese Frosting.

    Notes

    To make easy, peasy Vanilla Sugar, tuck a split Vanilla Bean into your bin of Sugar. The longer it sits, the deeper it will perfume your granules. I used all-purpose, unbleached, unbromated Flour (with no leavening agents) not Cake Flour. It just works here. Try to use the specked Beans from a Fresh Vanilla Pod. It's vibrant and yummy. Allow your "Wet" ingredients to come to room temperature for best results. (setting your ingredients out 35-45 minutes before handling them is a great start...general rule of thumb: you want to press your thumb into the Butter and leave a soft impression)

    http://www.thesquishymonster.com/2012/05/rainy-day-pink-cake.html

     

    I hope that everyone had a lovely day with their Families!

    …wishing both my Brother’s were here.

    XOXO

    Your Squishy Monster :)

     

    Categories: Cakes/Cupcakes, Cakes/Cupcakes, Holidays, Life | 6 Comments

  5. Baby Brother is Home!

    May 12, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    With the arrival of the guy who can make me laugh like none other, is also the informal introduction of Summer for me.  (Yes, I know Summer isn’t until June).  If you can bat away the cobwebs for a moment, hopefully you can remember what the word “Summer” evoked during your school years.  It usually meant Ice Cream, sun tan lotion, Movies, short-shorts, and a proudly beaming Sun, among other things.  I don’t have children of my own (and I’m not sure if I want to, still thinkin’) but my baby brother’s are damn near close to being my very own.  I took a pretty heavy interest in raising them and it’s a strange and beautiful relationship that I have with the both of them and I wouldn’t have changed it for the World.  When either of  my baby brother’s are in town, it’s like a direct call for a celebration-hence the early arrival of Summer!  Baby Brother and I have since spread a blanket outside and absorbed some extra Vitamin D and have dipped into a brand spankin’ new carton of Chunky Monkey…and thankful to have it too because we rolled around lazily on our blanket outside, excited to hear the Ice Cream Trucks anthem blaring to announce its arrival just salivating for a Bomb Pop and yet, couldn’t gather ourselves up to walk the 10 paces to get a bar.  Lazy–haha.

    This is what the scenery looked like to pick him up yesterday:

    after battling the other Freshmen Parents for a parking spot and breathlessly hauling everything that had managed to squeeze into a dorm no bigger than a slightly larger, glorified box (how did it all fit)!?…we’d mustered up a pretty monstrous appetite and poor baby (who had apparently run out on his meal card and was too proud of say anything and therefore living on nothing but Burritos and Ramen)suggested Thai.

    Pad Thai

    Mee Krob

    Green Tea Ice Cream Mochi (which I figured was a Japanese thing, but hey, I’m not complaining.  Yummy is yummy)

    It feels just like yesterday when we were struggling to navigate the campus and was busily bustling away to pick up the last few random objects we’d forgotten to take care of back home.  I mean, it feels like just yesterday that it was ME!  (cue baby brother to point out that now, it’s going on 10 years)  EEK!!  How does this thing called life zip past in fast forward without you being none the wiser?  Speaking of, baby brother will be venturing off to Toronto in a few weeks.  If schedule permits, hopefully I get to hang out with him there for a bit.  I’m sure Toronto will open up a new chapter in our “Food Holiday” for us :)

    With the arrival of your College Kids and Mother’s Day–just a reminder to hold your dear ones close.  (and closer).  My 26- going on 110 year old self realizes that it’s not just about the great food you eat—it’s about who you eat them with!!!

    XOXO

    Your nostaglic Squishy Monster

    p.s. a new video will be up soon! =D

    Categories: Life | 8 Comments

  6. A Perfect Example of Love

    Mother's Day Tea Cakes

    May 10, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    As Mother’s Day fast approaches, so many memories that me and Mama made flash through my head like an automatic Rolodex.  I am so incredibly lucky to have her in my life.  She is my perfect example of Love.

    19 years old and so much swag ;)

    Me at 26: Mom, I’m becoming more and more like you everyday (and I don’t mind it).

    I hope that everyone has a fabulous Mother’s Day (and Happy Mother’s Day to all the Mama’s)!

    I leave you with a taste of our Tradition:

    Print
    Almond Tea Cakes

    Almond Tea Cakes

    Ingredients

      Dry:
    • 2 1/2 c Flour
    • 1 1/2 ts Baking Powder
    • 1 ts Salt
      • Wet:
    • 1 stick soft, unsalted Butter
    • 1 1/2 c white granulated Sugar
    • 1/2 c Brown Sugar
    • 1/4 c Almond Paste (canned/store bought or homemade)
    • 2 room temperature Eggs
    • 2 tb Almond Extract
    • 12 oz room temperature full fat Ricotta
    • Powdered Sugar for Dusting
    • Flaked Almonds for Garnish
      • Almond Paste
    • 1 c blanched Almonds (skinned)
    • 1 c powdered Sugar
    • 1 Egg White
    • 1/8 ts fine Salt

    Instructions

    1. Cream together your Butter, Sugars, and Paste.
    2. Blend in one Egg at a time.
    3. Tip in your Extract.
    4. Spoon in your Ricotta. Blend.
    5. In three additions, incorporate your dry bowl with your wet bowl. Don't over mix.
    6. Scoop out miniature balls of dough and press flaked Almonds on top.
    7. Bake at 350 for 7-11 minutes (again, these are for mini scoops).
    8. Cool completely and dust with powdered Sugar.
      9. Alternately, for a Glaze:
    9. Whisk together powdered Sugar + Almond Extract (tip in just a couple drops in at a time) for a thick "glaze/icing" consistency. A little Extract goes a long way.
      10. Almond Paste:
    10. Utilize your processor and blitz your Almonds until they're powdered. Add in your powdered Sugar, Egg White and Salt. Keep in the fridge in an airtight container for up to a month.
    http://www.thesquishymonster.com/2012/05/a-perfect-example-of-love.html

    Reminiscent of Mommy and Me Tea Parties, Happy (early) Mother’s Day y’all!

    XOXO

    Your Blessed Squishy Monster

    Categories: Cakes/Cupcakes, Cakes/Cupcakes, Holidays, Holidays | 10 Comments

  7. Weird, but Delicious

    Sea Snail (Whelk) Salad

    May 7, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    I brought this over to my friends house.  They wanted nothing to do with it.  I share this recipe with you in hopes that some of y’all will have an adventurous enough spirit to give this a go, at least once…and to be quite honest, I’ve fooled my friends into trying it (unbeknownst to them) before so muhahahah to you! When you dine at any Korean Restaurant, it’s typical for a nice spread of various “Banchan” (side dishes) to be brought out to accompany your meal.  Everything is served in a manner that quite honestly, can’t be separated from one “Muchim” (mixed Banchan) to another.  When lured in by the sight of fatty meats grilling table side, pleasantly sputtering in its own juices, and you and your friends are high on the anticipation of comedically large, steaming bowls of this spicy Soup or that savory Noodle dish, being brought out for the sole purpose of pleasuring you, it’s easy to persuade them to try everything spread at the table before them.  Hence, the trickery!  I distinctly remember them both eating this and liking it so it’s just a situation of mind over matter.

    After spending a weekend with the queen of finicky eaters, I am so not beyond concealing one thing into another just to get someone to eat something.  (I shaved an apple into Princesses Strawberry Milkshake with heaping spoons of ground Flax Seed and she was known the wiser).  I encourage you to set this out with your Kimchi and see how quickly it disappears!

    Print
    Sea Snail (Whelk) Salad

    Sea Snail (Whelk) Salad

    Ingredients

    • 1 can of Bai Top (Sea Snails), rinsed, drained, cut into pieces
    • 4 Garlic cloves, finely minced
    • 2 ts Rice Vinegar
    • 1 tb Sesame Oil
    • 2 ts Fish Sauce
    • 1 tb Sugar
    • 2 tb Red Pepper Flakes
    • 3 tb Red Pepper Paste
    • 1 tb Sesame Seeds
    • 1/2 English Cucumber
    • 1/4 c shredded Carrots
    • 1/4 c cut Cabbage
    • 2 Green Onions

    Instructions

    1. In a small bowl, sprinkle your Cucumber slices with 1 tb of Salt (to draw out the moisture). Allow it to sit for about 10 minutes, drain and squeeze the excess moisture out.
    2. In a separate large bowl, mix your "sauce" together which is everything but your Veggies and Meat.
    3. Toss in your Veggies and Snails.
    4. Take your gloved hands and massage/press everything together. It will produce a vibrant ruby Salad.
    5. Store in the fridge.
    http://www.thesquishymonster.com/2012/05/weird-but-delicious.html

    Categories: Korean Food, Korean Food, Spicy, Spicy, Videos | 13 Comments

  8. My Illustrated Weekend

    May 6, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    I feel like I’ve gone a bit mad.  You know how some girls submerge their blues in a pretty dish of pink ice cream?  I am no exception but extend past this fact with enough food to feed a massive army.  I am too embarrassed to post images of everything food-related for this past weekend but suffice it to say that there were many bottomless bowls of various things spooned over with Nutella involved.  My pretty little Princess in all her wide-eyed optimism came bouncing down the stairs one morning, making a quick bee-line to the fridge and helped herself to a bowl of Ice-Cream of mammoth proportions.  (Mind you she’s itty bitty) and gleefully snuggled close and exclaimed the brilliance of her chosen breakfast.  So two things here, D.S.S. would probably intervene for my lack of responsible parenting and her enthusiasm gave way to the next hour of staring at Saturday Morning Cartoons with an open bag of this Chocolate Cereal that should quit lying and call itself what it really is: cookie-candy.

    This stuff is crazy dangerous.  If I ever had Kids, I don’t know how I could justify feeding this to them for Breakfast….but then again, I stare at my Nieces pleading doe-eyes and quickly reconsider.  Parenting has got to be some tough stuff.  I don’t know how y’all do it!

    Strawberry Milkshakes are a necessity when over seeing two girls hula-hooping.

    Strawberry Cupcakes with Strawberry Cream Cheese Frosting and Chocolate Ganache.  Princess wanted to know what Ganache was.

    These represent the better parts of my Childhood.  (but yet another example of what should be included in the list of “things you should not feed your Kids).  The label reads a scary Calorie and Fat content, the ingredient following Chocolate is Cheese? and on the bottom, it clearly states “does not contain Pig Fat.”  I didn’t even know that was a thing, lol.

    Don’t worry, there was some actual food involved, too.  Spicy Shrimp with Cilantro and Jasmine Rice

    Grilled Garlic Beef Tenderloin with Cilantro-Lime Corn.  I am a Woman obsessed!  I want Cilantro-everything lately.

    More Cilantro, please! (and tying into the Shrimp and Cilantro theme, too) :)

    Today, I spent a portion of my day in the Artsy-Fartsy district of Town where they had Street Vendors set up.  I guess little girls really dig hula hoops!
    I saw this little guy next to the Local Brewery stand.  It’s very odd, the things I notice.

    That’s my weekend in a nutshell.  I hope everyone had a fun and delicious weekend!

    XOXO

    Your Squishy Monster

     

    Categories: Life | 7 Comments

  9. Fill in the Facts Friday

    May 4, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    1. This weekend, I am most looking forward to making Lemon Blueberry Pancakes with my Niece.  (I intend on posting a video for this recipe).
    2. The highlight of today was getting an Ice Cream Cone with my Niece.
    3. I am loving my multi-colored nails right now ;)
    4. For Breakfast, I ate smoked Salmon

     

    1. I want to go swimming!
    2. I smell the pear-berry lotion that my Niece made me put on
    3. I am listening to Kimbra over and over again.  and again.

    Grilling Burgers & Hot Dogs tonight.  My pretty Princess just informed me that she doesn’t like buns and that she’d like a large swirly mound of Ketchup on the side of hers =D

    Happy Weekend Everyone!

    XOXO

    Your Squishy Monster

    Categories: Life | 1 Comment

  10. Cheesy, Meaty, Crunchy, Gooey

    May 3, 2012 by The Squishy Monster

    Bacon-Cheese-Fritters.  With all things considered, it’s hard to think you need much more beyond that.  Of course, I say this facetiously, but I don’t imagine that I’m too far off.

    This idea sprung on me one morning as I sat eating a late Breakfast of heavy, streaky slices of Bacon, topped with melted, broiled Cheese, on crunchy, golden Toast.  These Bacon Cheese Fritters are exactly what I had for Dinner that night…an echo of an earlier meal but made even more delicious with the magical properties of hot, bubbling oil.

    This is even further accessible for the fact that a). they’re super easy and b). when a generous portion of Bacon is fried off and Cheese is grated earlier in the day, half your assembling work for dinner is completed.

    Here’s how to do it:

    Print
    Bacon Cheese Fritters

    Prep Time: 30 minutes

    Cook Time: 15 minutes

    Bacon Cheese Fritters

    Ingredients

    • 2 c Shredded Mozzarella (Smoked is very nice)
    • 8 slices of crisped Bacon
    • 1/2 c Italian Bread Crumbs + healthy grating of Parmigiano-Reggiano (if you have any)
    • 2 beaten Eggs
      • Egg Wash
    • 2 beaten Eggs + 2 tb Cream (or full fat Milk)
    • 2 c Panko Bread Crumbs

    Instructions

    1. Combine your ingredients together in a bowl
    2. Roll a spoonful or so of your mixture into a ball
    3. Dip your ball into your Egg-wash and roll into your Panko
    4. Chill all your prepared Fritters in the Fridge for at least 30 min
    5. Fry in batches (the oil should be at 360 or so--a fry thermometer helps)
    6. Retrieve your Fritters when they've reached a deep, golden brown. Remember not to overcrowd the oil and to leave at least 2 inches or so on top in your heavy bottomed pan.

    Notes

    If you'd like a flavored oil, plunge a stalk of fresh Rosemary into your Oil first for a few minutes. Great "frying oils" are ones with high smoke points= Safflower, Peanut, Canola, Veggie, etc. Remember that Extra Virgin Olive Oil should never be used for frying.

    http://www.thesquishymonster.com/2012/05/cheesy-meaty-salty-gooey.html

    Wishing everyone a delicious and Cheesy day!

    XOXO

    Your Squishy Monster =D

    Categories: Comfort Foods, Comfort Foods, Videos | 18 Comments

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